The upside of stress

The upside of stress explores the power our attitudes have when it comes to dealing with stress. The book explains the inner working of our biological & psychological responses to stress and opens up new perspectives on how stress can help us grow. Think about stress in a completely new way. Deadlines to meet, problems to solve, traffic to wait in, bills to pay: the list of things that stress us out is long. In fact, modern life seems to be filled with stress from the time we get up in the morning until we go to bed at night. But what if the hectic pace is actually good for us?

Though we usually think of stress as something negative, there’s another side to the story: through the ages it seems like our bodies have developed ways to handle stress in much more complex and ingenious ways than we realize. It may even help us grow stronger and healthier.

1. Stress is harmful when you believe it is

We’ve all heard a million times that stress is bad for us and that it’s the cause of most illnesses. So why should we all of a sudden embrace it?

Think about what stress really is: a reaction that occurs when something you care about is at stake. This could be your frustration over a traffic jam or your grief over the loss of a loved one.

Your attitude toward stress is a central part of your mindset which shapes the choices you make in everyday life. If you view stress as harmful, you tend to try and avoid it at all costs. People who view stress as helpful, on the other hand, are more likely to come up with strategies to cope with the source of stress, seek help and make the best of the situation.

Are you a person who faces stress head-on? Chances are you’ll feel more confident about handling life’s challenges. In this way, the belief that stress is helpful becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. But what if stress makes you want to head for the hills? No need to fret! The following will help you shift your mindset.

2. A stressful life is often a meaningful one

Sounds counterintuitive right? But just listen to this. In 2005 and 2006, researchers from the Gallup World Poll asked more than 125,000 people aged 15 and over if they had experienced a great deal of stress the day before. On average, around a third of each country’s population said they experienced stress.

So how did these statistics line up with other data? Results surprised researchers. Nations that exhibited higher levels of stress were also likely to have a higher GDP, longer life expectancy and improved quality of living. Conversely, countries like Mauritania with low levels of stress were prone to high levels of corruption, poverty, hunger or violence.

This is what the author calls the stress paradox: happy lives contain stress, and stress-free lives don’t guarantee happiness. How can we explain this?

Well, perhaps because a meaningful life is also necessarily a stressful one. According to a 2013 study at Stanford and Florida State University, people who reported the greatest number of stressful events in their past were most likely to consider their lives meaningful.

And what about you? Do you consider your life meaningful, and why? We often derive our sense of purpose from the different roles we play and responsibilities we have – in our jobs, as parents, and in our relationships. The activities that feel the most meaningful are precisely the ones that are the greatest sources of stress in our lives.

Research also tells us that lives with less stress may also lack happiness. Humans tend to be happier when they are busy. This might explain why retirement, a time in life when we suddenly have less to do than we’re used to, increases the risk of depression by as much as 40 percent.

3. Just thinking about stress differently helps us cope

With hundreds of articles, radio talks and editorials on the topic, stress seems to be one of the greatest conundrums of this century. Nearly everyone we know finds stress a struggle.

However, without stress, we’d have far fewer opportunities to grow and learn. Additionally, accepting that stress is normal makes us less likely to view every challenge as a catastrophe.

These resilient people recognize that no matter how stressful things are, life does go on. They continue to make choices that will change the situation or themselves. But where does their reserve of strength come from? Interestingly enough, it often develops as a result of experiencing hard times in the past.

4. Seeing the positive side of stress makes you more resilient

Think of a time in your life that led to positive changes, a newfound purpose or significant personal growth. It’s not unlikely that these times followed periods that were very stressful. That’s the paradox of stress! Although it’s frustrating, the paradox of stress makes a lot of sense, too.

The idea that what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger is far from new. It can be found in the teachings of religions and philosophies for centuries. In fact, 82 percent of respondents in one study, when asked how they cope with stress in their lives, cited previous stressful experiences as sources of strength. In other words: adversity helps us learn and grow.

Living a sheltered life can actually do us more harm than good in the long run. Psychologist Mark Seery found that individuals unfamiliar with adversity were the least resilient to it.

The reality is that seeing the upside of things makes a dramatic improvement in our coping abilities. Rather than relying on ineffective avoidance strategies, people who see the upside are able to take proactive steps to deal with their stress. Even their bodies demonstrate a healthier physical response to stress: they have faster recovery times and a reduced risk of depression, heart attacks and diseases.

By Kelly McGongal